From Despair to Hope

The story of Muluh Hilda Bih from Bamenda, Cameroon, Africa

I was born into a loving family in a small town of Bamenda in the North West Region of Cameroon. In a culture where children were the pride of their parents and the entire family, my birth was greeted with much joy since they had waited for over four years for a second. The family’s joy was however short lived when it was noticed that I was developing difficulties in walking and using my hands. My great grandmother who was babysitting us at that time, scolded and beat me, hoping I could I would stop what I was doing, but as the days went by, the situation only got worse.

When my parents noticed that the movement difficulties were not of my making, they decided to take me to the hospital. Thus began a period of moving from hospital to hospital to find out what the problem was, to no avail. Unable to obtain a solution from the hospital, we resorted to witchdoctors and I had to be moved from one to another, living in each place for several months until we were fed up at the lack of progress. Meanwhile I had reached the school going age of six, was brought back home, underwent surgery and started school with the help of calipers and lots of family support.

Going to church was very much a part of our household, growing up, but I never had a personal awareness of God, until I was around 12. This was when I started asking questions about what was happening to me. My condition was worsening despite all the efforts that had been made. I was particularly disappointed that I visited even faith healers and still there was no change. I started developing anger against God, others and even life, I came to the conclusion that God did not love me, otherwise He wouldn’t punish me with a disease no one understood or could do anything about. By the time was about 17, I had developed full rebellion against God and life, due to two incidents that affected me profoundly: my father had a serious car accident and I lost an aunt who was like a mother to me, to HIV/AIDS.I resolved to take away my life, I tried twice but did not succeed.

Through all of this, the sacrificial love of my family was a constant encouragement to me, even though by now I no longer went to church or read the Bible. One afternoon, I came across a book that a high school classmate was holding, the title was simply JONI. It turned out to be one of two books that would eventually change the course of my life. These two books helped me to see how God could still work in lives affected by suffering, disease and disability. I realized how sinful and ungrateful I had been, although all the while I thought I was a good person. I prayed and asked for forgiveness from God, and made a decision to trust Him from then on.

After making a decision to trust Christ, my condition continued to degenerate and I have lost almost all use of my limbs and I’m wheelchair bound. I later on found out it is Muscular Dystrophy,a debilitating disease that progressively weakens the muscles. I look back now and I am truly grateful that God is using disability and weakness to draw me closer to Himself, to reveal His glory and to encourage others. He has blessed and gifted me in ways that I would never have imagined and I rejoice to be a tool, albeit a weak one, in the hands of the King. Like Paul, I know His grace is sufficient to see me through the rest of this earthly journey, and look forward to the day when Christ shall return or take me home, where there will be no more pain, sorrow, suffering or wheelchairs. I consider my time here a privilege and a responsibility to point others to Jesus.

Are you suffering from a disease?  Are you angry or discouraged like Hilda?  God loves you and has a good plan for your life.  To  experience His love, all you need to do is open your heart and life to Him.  The following is a suggested prayer.  If you are sincere when you pray this prayer, Jesus will come into your life and you will experience His love, power and forgiveness.

Lord Jesus, I want to know You personally. Thank You for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to You and ask You to come in as my Savior and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank You for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of person You want me to be.

If you prayed this prayer we would love to hear from you . If you would like to know God deeper we can connect you with an email mentor and/or send you some great links.

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