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“The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” Proverbs 12:18

“The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.” Proverbs 15:4

Early in our marriage, my wife and I agreed on this simple, biblical idea: words count. I can’t recall if we came to it after a disagreement, or by watching couples hurt each other, but it seems Solomon had this figured out a few millennia ago.

Reckless words pierce like swords and perverse ones crush the spirit, he warned, but soothing ones bring life and wise ones heal.

Maybe these verses underscore the obvious, but so often we treat words like computer bytes — weightless and dimensionless, and therefore harmless. Perhaps we have accepted the lie that sticks and stones break bones, but words cannot hurt us.

Leading marriage researcher John Gottman observed that couples most prone to divorce are likely to pepper their talk with criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling (giving the silent treatment).

“Can’t you do anything right?” criticizes someone’s behavior and gouges their soul.

“Don’t blame me! I did nothing wrong!” dodges responsibility behind a wall of defensiveness.

“I hate you! How could you be so mean?!” tells the truth with damaging contempt.

“I have nothing to say to you!” may lead to hours — or days — of aching silence.

In the academic study of communication, such phrases are called “speech acts” because they “do” something to our spirits. They are worse than sticks and stones, for they puncture our heart like an enemy’s spear causing us to bleed emotionally and relationally.

Our words count, for they either tear down and wound, or build up and heal. Are you choosing life-giving language?

God, You brought this world together by speaking it into existence, and like You I may create universes of care, love, and encouragement in people around me. Help me choose nourishing, soul-growing things to say to people around me. Amen.

By Dr. Bill Strom

Used by permission
www.thelife.com/dailydevotions

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“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.” James 4:7-10 (ESV)

The LORD has prompted me in the past not to be double-minded. At the time I was a bit hurt and said “Surely not I?” As far as I was concerned, I was not, in any way double-minded. I was, so I thought, sold out for God, and He should have known it. Sadly, He did know exactly where I was.

As I have become more familiar with The Way so I have come to realize, where there are areas of my life that are not, in reality, whatever I have said or however I have acted up, totally given over to Him. My self-centeredness gets in the way. I want so many things. When we are squeezed by life, it is an education to see what peeps out from underneath the facade.

I had an example recently. I wanted to interact with someone from a self- centered point-of-view. I am glad to say that for once I saw it coming so I was able to submit this thought into Jesus’ care and know His safety. I believe, consequently, what the person saw as we talked was, Jesus in me, not the child within jumping about like a four year old saying, “look at me, me, me” getting in the way of the message! As a result, when a question was asked of me I was able to point the person in the right direction, just because I was in the right place. In myself, I find it hard to be humble. The world tells me, with all its self-seeking, that this is not something to be acquired.

I do desire to come near to God because this is His place of safety, love and peace. His promise is that as I reach out to Him I will find Him.

PRAYER: LORD, today as we come before You, forgive us our failures, strengthen us at our point of need and send us back out into the world as Your disciples with the courage to take You with us wherever we are sent. Moreover, LORD, humble us so that we do not get in the way of Your Kingdom work through our lives. Amen.

By Rod Marshall

Brought to you by www.thoughts-about-god.com

Words Count

Double Minded, Me?

Tag: <span>hope</span>

Words Count

Double Minded, Me?