“God who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful.” 1 Corinthians 1:9
In my talks with women, I find that many a mother’s heart has been broken because a son or a daughter is avoiding her. I hear words like these: “My children never call me.” “My daughter’s phone calls are brief and businesslike.” “My children and I are not on speaking terms.”
I pass on to them what has helped me during a time of estrangement from my children.
Estrangements may have come gradually or suddenly due to a family crisis—as in my case. “If only we could talk,” I’d often think. “Then we would come to some understanding.”
A dear friend advised me, “this may not be the time for talking. No matter what you say, it will sound like you’re being self-defensive and you are apt to get a harsh response. Give your children time to sort out their confusion and pain. When you are in conflict, concentrate on reconciliation rather than resolution.”
Trust in God’s timing. While you wait you can be a grace-giver. Grace lets go of unrealistic expectations like “you-guys-owe-me. After all I’ve done for you.” Let go of resentment and bitterness. Resentment and bitterness locks the door to God’s grace.
Parcel up your hurt and disappointment and give it to God. Be a grace-giver rather than a grudge-bearer. Grace gives your children freedom to grow, to make decisions, to fail and to mature at their own rate.
Pray for your children by name and wait expectantly for Jesus, the great Reconciler, to bring you together again. And when they do come, welcome them with a loving embrace. In the story of the prodigal son it’s interesting to note that the Father runs to meet the son. Very few words are spoken. It’s a time of rejoicing and celebration not explanation.
Recently our family of nineteen persons came together for a Family Reunion—the first after many years. When I witnessed the joy and fun at being together, I kept saying, “This is amazing! Thank you, Lord.” God has truly done a healing work in our hearts. Many prayers are being answered. The reconciliation work is going on.
What’s happening in your family? Remember, when we pray for reconciliation in our families, we are praying in God’s will. Reconciliation is always His will. Jesus is the Great Reconciler.
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